Barry Town ban smoking in Managers Technical area

[Nic Otine]

Barry Town have taken the lead by banning smoking in Jenner Park in the managers technical area.

The move is seen to protect the health of mangers as the job in itself is stressful enough without the ill effects of cigarettes.

Nobody was available for comment at the club due to a bad bout of colds and chest infections but its felt that the owner wouldnt want a manager to be ill on his shift and still owing part of the 15k let alone die.

However die hard fan Harry Probert aged 96 did have this comment to make " I can see why the club have taken this step. I smoke 60 fags a day and you can tell the effect it has on my bugle blowing in the stands on a Saturday. I used to raise a right real gusto but the fags have really taken the wind out of my sails. "

Dave Collins from CASH stated " that these are real dark days for Welsh League football when a manager cant enjoy a quite fag in the comfort of his own technical area. We will fight Barry Town every step of the way and we wont accept any no's or BUTTS and we hope that this doesnt FILTER to other clubs in the league. We all like the odd fag now and then"

There are rumours that a welsh league player was seen smoking this Saturday on a pitch and police are investigating and hope to make an arrest soon.

Anyone with any information please phone immediately your nearest Barry Town fan so we can assist police in finding this scoundrel.

Forensics were in attendance at the alledged incident and a fag butt was retrieved for tests to be carried out.

Lets hope he gets caught soon for the safety of Welsh League football.

[Graham Owen]

Outragious oh well, our lady physio smokes a pipe inbetween mending the boys so a tricky decision lies ahead for our committee who are also no strangers to a quick drag behind the stand on a saturday. Our fifth sub is also no stranger to the long fag which in fact to my amazement, seems to calm everybody down in the close vicinity of the dug out. These are worrying times indeed and you just wonder where it will all end

[Gavlar]

I have it from good sources that on Saturday 2 managers of a 3rd division side who shall remain nameless, were seen sharing a bong in the dugout during half time.

I think I maybe able to help identify the smoker that police are looking to apprehend and his surname is ASH.

[Robin The Echo Man]

I remember the old stands at Jenner. Guys used to poke their cocks thru holes in the corrugated iron to releive themselves. Me' n' me Mates used to grab 'em and demand money lest we chopped off their cocks. My older brother once made £5.50.

I made nothing when I got caught.

I had a bag of cocks though. The owners went on to run the club.

[Bridgeys Nemesis]

Please stop with all of this - you are spoiling Bridgey's "Moving in day" at Barry town where he is taking over!

Cardiff Corries are gutted to lose the former (Enter every single Welsh League Club) striker but the residents of Radyr have now removed their petition against the club on the grounds that their complaints regarding air polution & noise pollution during 1st team home games will now cease to be an issue!

;D

[Little sitting bull]

HOW!!!! the before mentioned spent 2 weeks in the summer in deepest darkest Indian territory where he learnt extensive use of smoke signals. I feel that part of Corries success is due to his new ability to communicate to players using cigarette smoke signals that opponents are at a loss to make sense off. I wonder if Barry players can grasp this new method of managent as quickly as the Corries players did!!!!

[Gavlar]

Was working in Barry today and went to buy some fags but was told that sale of tobacco was as off yesterday a criminal offence within a 2 mile radius of Jenner park. Was at a loss and after advice I went to radyr and the Corries ground and picked up butts from the home dugouts. Got enough to lasts months!!!

Just to inform police have formed a roadblock on all routes out of Barry in search of the infamous welsh league smoker. I hope for the publics safety he is apprehended soon.

[Radyr G]

We at Radyr Convenience Store are absolutely devastated at this sad and shocking news.

The departure of Lee Bridgeman will now result in the closure of our local store because sale of tobacco products to Mr Bridgeman accounted for half of our annnual turnover and now I would imagine that the business will, as always, go to a Tesco or Asda on the road to barry.

I see this as another slight against the local shop owners. I didn't care that I couldn't open the shop door on a Saturday for fear of choking on the smog in Radyr as long as I had the money to feed my Wife and Kids!

[the smog]

Devastating news flash!!!!!! Apparently Bridgeman has booked to see a smoking council!!! Could this be the end or part of the Barry town agreement???

[Radyr community pcso]

I have some breaking news that should clear the dark cloud hanging over radyr and in particular our local teams football pitch.

Police can announce that they have made a significant arrest in the local area. At 5 am this morning an articulated lorry got stuck under the railway bridge leading to the Corries pitch. On further examination the lorry was found to contain over 3 million cigarettes.

This is good news for the Local community and in particular the local store which was set to shut following the loss of it's best customer announced this weekend.

Police are pleased with the seizure but are Keam to trace a green escort which was seen leaving the scene this morning.

[Radyr Comp Teacher]

I would like to throw my weight behind the disasterous news that Lee bridgeman has departed Cardiff Corinthians to join Barry Town.

Radyr is a very affluent are of Cardiff and as such has a "certain type" of child living with in the area.

Mr Bridgeman, at the top of his voice at every home game, has taught these young darlings new words that no matter how far in aducation they should go they would never otherwise have learned.

He was a visionary within the Radyr Community and his loss to the local English Language developmental Committee will be massive!

We hope Barry appreciate what they are gaining!!!!!!!

[A Syllum]

Authorities are today due to decide the fate of a Community of Bolivian farmers and there application for asyllum in Wales. The community which numbers some 200 and is similar in size to Taffs Well is reliant on the growth and sale of the tobacco plant for its existance.

The Puff-Puff tribe is reliant on Barry which purchases all of its annual growth of the tobacco crop, but following the decision to ban smoking within a 2 mile Radius of Jenner the Bolivian. community face possible extinsion.

A decision is expected later today and a spokesman for the group is hopeful of a favourable ruling.

[Counting Crows]

[justin]

I met Mr Bridgeman in a hypermarket in Calais, seemed a very nice guy to me.

[S Plif]

Heard a rumour that barrys home game this weekend is to be sponsored by the imperial tobacco company. Any truth in this?

Also myself and my wife have been too scared to leave the house since there has been no news on the apprehension of the disgusting welsh league smoker. We are worried that he may strike again this weekend. Are there any new leads or are the police any closer to finding him? The world will be a better place when he is off our streets.